Do you remember that guy who's girlfriend didn't leave her bathroom for two years and was physically stuck to the toilet?
That's right. Last we saw Kory McFadden he was getting probation for letting his girlfriend sit on the toilet for 2 years. Well, guess what! He won the lottery!
A Kansas man whose girlfriend was physically stuck to the toilet in their home has won $20,000 in the state Lottery, for the second time this year.
Whoa whoa whoa fucking whoa. For the second time this year? This fuckstick won the lottery. Twice. In one year. The same year he let his girlfriend get stuck to a toilet and then also got a six month bit on "...an unrelated charge of lewd and lascivious behavior for exposing himself to a teenage neighbor in March." Quite a year my friend.
I don't have too much to add here except: fuck this guy. Seriously. Are you there God, it's me, Pemulis. Again. Double you tee eff, God.
Though it makes you wonder if perhaps people like me are the ones God made most closely to his own image. Assholes with an appreciation for irony and schadenfreude and such... Yup, that's what I'm going with. There is a God and he's just like me.