Octopus Sex Watcher Avoids Jail Time Because He's Self Conscious About His Teeth

For real.

A TASMANIAN man caught downloading images of sexual acts with an octopus has avoided a jail term.

The real question that needs asking here is: who's the person in the image, having sex with an octopus? Because obviously two octopi going at it is like, Nat Geo shit. That's not illegal. So this is obviously a picture of some person, having some kind of sex with a fucking octopus. Why isn't anyone going after the person in the picture!?

Rodney Scott McLagan, 48, of South Arm in Hobart was caught with 31,000 images and video files involving sexual acts with children, dogs, ponies, snakes, tigers and an octopus.

I... well, ok. That's bad. I wonder why they decided to use the octopus in the headline of the story(their story - I used it in my headline because they did, I'm a copy kitty!). Is an octopus somehow weirder or worse than a snake or a tiger? and couldn't they have maybe played up the pedophile angle instead of the bestiality angle? A guy likes to watch dogs go at it? Who cares? Oh... he also likes to watch young children go at it... Don't know why you mentioned that so nonchalantly right before dogs and ponies.

Justice David Porter said McLagan had a personality disorder that caused him to avoid interpersonal contact and gave him a pre-occupation with being criticised or rejected,

The Mercury reported today.

I think just about everyone faces fear of rejection at some point, and yet somehow most of us don't watch child pornography or animal pornography... But I'm sure there's more solid reasoning behind the no jail time thing...

"Without the opportunity for normal sexual relationships fantasy is often indulged," the judge said yesterday.

Like priests! So that's why they get away with it!

"It also emerges from the report that you are particularly self-conscious about your teeth." He said McLagan's self-esteem was so low he equated himself with a beast.

There's something sweet
And almost kind
But he was mean and he was coarse and unrefined
And now he's dear
And so unsure
I wonder why I didn't see it there before

The judge said McLagan had little, if any, interest in child pornography and that it was accessed while he was trawling for bestiality images. He said there was no suggestion that McLagan paid for, sold or distributed any of the material. He sentenced McLagan to four months in jail, wholly suspended, and fined him $1500.

"Oh, this picture of two little boys blowing each other? That came up when I was looking for Koala porn. I only saved it to make myself look more normal in case anyone ever raided the hard drive"

He was also put on the sex offenders register for four years.

Phew.

h/t to bohm