Monday, July 28, 2008

Expert Analysis on Drunken Mishaps

A neighbor says he was intoxicated...who ya gunna believe?

A recent G-Chat Convo edited soley for spelling - can't be looking like an idiot. Also I edited it to make it seem like berbalerbs is in love with me. Anyway, so this 56 year old guy from Milwaukee shot his lawnmower because it wouldn't start. Surprisingly, this did not help the lawn mower start. Must've been an American made mower - these colors do not crack under the threat of torture. But so here's our expert take on things:


B: hahahahaha Live Vote: Was he justified? And 6 years? For fucking realz? So a kardashian can get a DUI and spend 85 minutes in jail, and this dude shoots HIS OWN LAWNMOWER and might get better than half a decade?

Pem: yup. but seriously... Who fucking shoots a lawnmower?

B: a drunk ass milwaukee yahoo...I've punched inanimate things that've stubbed my toe before... when i was 12

Pem: Yea. i mean, we've all punched walls and shaken women, but shooting a lawnmower is a little different, I mean... dude had to be pissed off enough to go somewhere to get the gun, then bring it back and shoot it. theres a bit of premeditation involved that is just completely unacceptable

B: Look at his picture; he probably has a gun positioned so that wherever he is on his property he is within 10 feet of a firearm

Pem: Very possible.

B: fer when the commies start a'comin

Pem: fer the darkies and the chinks whats comin at mah lawn

B: or if he should ever see an individual of color
...damn! you beat me.

Pem: Hicks are racist and drunk and stupid... and ripe for parody!!!

B: I am so in love with you.

1 comment:

  1. That last line is NOT what I said!!!!!

    ...there were like, 4 more "o's" in sooooo in love with you.