2.5 Gallons of Wine + Jedi Church = Amazing

I like stories like this because I don't have to add much to it.

Some folks from the church of the Jedi Church were having one of their ritual lightsaber fights, and a neighbor with a penchant for drinking decided to join the fun.

A man who dressed up as Darth Vader, wearing a garbage bag for a cape, and assaulted the founders of a group calling itself the Jedi church was given a suspended sentence Tuesday.

Arwel Wynne Hughes, 27, attacked Jedi church founder Barney Jones — aka Master Jonba Hehol — with a metal crutch, hitting him on the head, prosecutors told Holyhead Magistrates' Court.

He also whacked Jones' 18-year-old cousin, Michael Jones — known as Master Mormi Hehol — bruising his thigh in the March 25 incident, prosecutors said.
...
Unfortunately for Hughes, his March attack was recorded on a video camera that the cousins had set up to film themselves in a light saber battle.

"Darth Vader! Jedis!" Hughes shouted as he approached.
Hughes claimed he couldn't remember the incident, having drunk the better part of a 2 1/2-gallon (10-liter) box of wine beforehand.

"He knows his behavior was wrong and didn't want it to happen but he has no recollection of it," said Hughes' lawyer, Frances Jones.

When reading the story, I assumed it could not possibly get any better... but then they say it's been videotaped and I feel like I must have died and am in heaven. THEN I find out the video's been online for a while, and now I'm certain I'm dead and in heaven.

Unfortunately, I'm not dead and this cubicle doesn't feel very heaven-y, and the video in no way lives up to as amazing as it sounds like it should be. Don't get me wrong. It's hilarious and amazing, but how could anything be as great as what our imaginations have already created?




Let's all say a prayer for Master Mormi Hehol and Master Jonba Hehol